VMAs: The good, the bad, the horrible!

The VMAs got mixed reviews, but all in all…not so bad!

VMAs

Well, the VMAs were interesting. This is supposed to be a best dressed post but there weren’t really any spectacular dressers. As a matter of fact, there were more poorly dressed celebs than anything else. So because Nicki Minaj’s new glam squad has apparently gotten hired by all of Hollywood, this will be more of a review. There will be a few fashion highlights sprinkled in but…yeah.

First, I want to put Justin Timberlake in my pocketbook. He tore that shit to pieces. He is the greatest artist right beneath Michael Jackson…yea I said it! Argue if you want, idgaf! And a shrunken tuxedo blazer for boys? Yes Please! He stole the show from every single person that left their homes to be there, and I as a Brooklynite dub him an honorary Brooklynite for the best VMAs performance ever!

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JT…just….yesss…yassss!!!

Gaga did her thing. It was little mild for her on the VMAs, but okay she can do whatever the hell she wants to.

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Gaga was weird and wonderful as usual. Just not AS weird

Everybody is getting on my Miley for that performance. I love her and I loved her performance. Her and Robin Thicke were a bit awkward…but so what. She’s young, rich, and sexy….and therefore excused to be as disgustingly ratchet as she pleases. Especially since there are women twice her age on any given reality show behaving four times as poorly. I’m not a fan of the married, wife-in-the-same-room crotch grabbing. Or the nude colored polyurethane retro 50’s swimsuit. Or the ass-less twerking. But guess what, she’s a fucking Disney kid. She went years having to act like she was a robot teenager who didn’t steal from Claire’s or let boys feel her up while playing Never Have I Ever. Leave her the fuck alone and let her live.

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This.

I’m not even a diehard rock fan or even particularly religious and even I was offended by that introduction of Kanye West. I even more offended by that performance. Someone please help me out in the comments, and explain to me what the bloody flucking hellz that song is about! That’s not hip hop.

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That’s why the whole performance was in shadow. He looks like he’s going to the laundromat

Again, I am a BK native, who grew up in the Biggie, Lil Kim, Wu-Tang, Mobb Deep, MOP era. Lil Kim has become a Jackson. Seriously, Iggy Azalea was more hardcore BK than Kim. Ugh. And the douche-tards over at MTV played the wrong Fucking version of Lighter’s Up! And what was she wearing? She looked like the scarecrows from the Wiz.

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Lil Kim…or the person who kidnapped her and took her life.

…and Foxy Brown’s purse did NOT match her dress, and somebody Lewinskied that shit. What is that stain Fox?

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2013 MTV Video Music Awards – Foxy…shit your ass down.

…Most of those One Direction boys need a damn comb. They look like they all just rolled out of the same bed. (that was not a gay joke, it was a five brothers sleeping together and kicking each other repeatedly in the head…joke) Good thing their fans are too young to have seen The Outsiders.

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…ASAP Rocky looked like a homophobic jackass jerk. And what’s up with the supposed style icon wearing the most basic outfit ever to the VMAs?!?

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Yeah

…this happened.

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2 Chains shares an embarrassing same outfit moment with a woman.

Just…Drake. And not in a good way.

I’m super-duper excited for Macklemore & Ryan Lewis they are doing very well in this rap game and they deserve every second. Though I hope Macklemore gives us more of the quirky fashion we got from him in the beginning. I know Thrift Shop was a gimmick, but his style was kinda funky off stage too.

The VMA 2013 was strange, sometimes awkward, and sometimes epic. It was all in all a pretty good show. And even the parts that didn’t work were like train wrecks that we couldn’t look away from. I did quite enjoy Katie’s performance on the Brooklyn Bridge! I’m looking forward to the TLC biopic, the new Hunger Games, and I laughed til I cried at the “Video Girls” Beats Pill commercials. But, I wasn’t expecting it to be as good as it was, especially see as though MTV hasn’t played an actual music video since 2002.

 

 

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